Deal's A Deal
by AFRiley
Summary: Kara is pregnant, hormonal and shipbound. Lee tried to console his wife, Cottle drugs her with sleeping pills and hilarity ensues.


_DEDICATED TO THE WONDERFUL KARA/LEE SHIPPERS ON THE SCI-FI FORUMS. YOU GUYS ROCK!_

"Lee, where you goin'?"

Kara opened one eye, then another. Her newly-obtained husband stumbled as he tried to fit his foot through the trouser leg, managing to look distinctly guilty in the process.

"Um... yeah, meeting with Dad, that's all."

"At 5 am, honey?" There was a somewhat dangerous note to "honey."

"Yeah. He's, um, busy all day today, so..."

"You know, _darling,_ the President won't be very happy if you barge into their quarters at this hour, and I'm pretty sure she stayed on the ship tonight. Want me to give you a minute to think of another excuse?"

The look of guilt intensified.

"Kara, I –"

"You were going to fly, weren't you?"

"No! I –"

"Deal's a deal, Lee."

"I was –"

"If you're flying, so am I."

"It's only a recon mission, Kara!" Lee shouted over her. Then he realised what he had said, and wince as if in pain.

Kara looked triumphant. Grinning, she slid off the bed and began to get dressed. Not uniform, of course; she hardly fit into it anymore.

"Cottle will kill you, Kara." Lee crossed his arms, trying to appear determined and failing miserably.

"Ha! Let him try. I can take him on, even seven months pregnant. And if he _dares_ to spike my drink with sleeping pills again so that you can fly off on your little mission, I will show him where hell is. I –"

Lee stifled a laugh. Yes, it had happened, once. Cottle got all protective of the Kara's baby when he found out she was expecting, and forbade her to go anywhere near a Viper. Of course she laughed it off and was in a uniform about ten minutes later. The next day, half an hour before they were to fly, Kara drank a cup of water that knocked her out until the next evening. Evidently, Cottle was very determined to take care of the unborn child – even against the mother's wishes. Lee was entirely supportive of Cottle's ferociousness in this case, something that Kara did not need to know.

"...he has no right!" Kara went on, still pulling on various pieces of clothing. "I am not sick, shot or dying of radioactivity exposure! For gods' sakes, I am quite capable of sitting in a cockpit, and my being the size of said cockpit has nothing to do with it. I am a pilot, not a good little housewife, and I am not sitting here for the next two months drinking disgusting fruit juices and eating mashed vegetables like a diseased bunny!"

Five minutes later, the two were sitting across each otherr, Lee with coffee and Kara with her much-hated carrot juice in front of them. She was eyeing the coffee enviously, but Cottle has expressly forbade her from drinking a drop of it. Helo was sitting there smoking, which did not help, as she was craving a cigarette as well as coffee and something decent to eat. 3C/p 

"She caught you out, didn't she?" Helo grinned at Lee. "Told you she would, Apollo, I-"

Kara growled and grabbed Helo's lapels.

"Don't. Mess. With. A. Pregnant. Woman."

Helo gulped. Lee sighed and gently pried Kara's fingers off his friend's jacket.

"Drink your juice, Kara."

She threw the two men a furious look and slouched back into her chair. Lifting the cup, she smelled it intently, trying to decide if she should risk drinking it. She decided she should not.

"Right, Apollo. You deal with your hormonal wife and I'll go wake up mine." Helo retreated from the room, Lee holding a furiously panting Kara by the shoulders.

Lee forced Kara to sit back down. She obeyed, slapping his hand off her waist as she did.

"Don't touch me. This is all your fault anyway."

"It takes two, doesn't it?" Lee wanted to cry from exasperation – or laugh, either way.

"Still your fault. Now I'm frakking shipbound, an obsessed doctor drugging me at every opportunity and the entire crew refusing to give me anything but raw vegetables to eat. It's like a ship-wide agreement to make my life hell."

Lee did laugh now – and earned a dark look from his wife.

"Kara, both Cottle and Dad just want a healthy baby, don't you understand?"

"Why don't they have one then?"

"I have to go now. You wait here, I'll be back in an hour, yeah? Cally is off duty as well, her and Athena will keep you company."

"What joy!" Kara said with a very false cheerfulness. "We'll talk about diapers and baby food and about having spent three months in the wonderfully enriching company of the toilet."

"Be a good girl, Kara."

And before she could lunge at him, Lee leapt out of the room, and added –

"Or I will call Cottle."


End file.
